How will your children remember you?
I remember my child hood in many different ways. I have some quite specific memories and other memories which are hazy.
The main thing I do remember about my childhood is that it was a happy one for the majority.
I grew up in a nice area, in a lovely house with a beautiful garden. We lived opposite our school, on the same road as the shops in our little village and the park was just around the corner.
We had an apple tree in the back garden which my sister and I would climb every summer. A large garage sat at the end of our driveway and I remember using the apple tree as a way of getting on top of the garage roof so I could sunbath on it in the summer.
We had many pets. Hamsters, rabbits, fish. In fact our pet cat is still going strong now!
I enjoyed going out with my friends, sitting in the park and going over their houses for tea.
Christmases were always a big family occasion spent around the dining room table with a feast of good food laid out before us.
We were happy.
Sadly, I lost my mum when I was 18 years old.
It pains me to say this, but in some ways I feel as though as I didn’t really know my mum as much as I would have liked to. Of course, when you’re a child, a teenager even, you don’t realise these things until you’re a little older.
You tend to take advantage of the fact that your mum is there and then all of a sudden when she’s no longer there it’s the little things you miss and you wish you could turn the clock back, just for a moment so you could have stayed in that night instead of going out, or so that you could give her one more hug or tell her just once more that you loved her.
I think for these reasons among a few other things is why I want my children to remember me exactly as I am.
Spending time with my children is more important than ever to me. Becoming a mum has changed my whole outlook on life.
I take pictures of my children daily and I makes sure that those photos don’t get lost on my phone. I print them and put them into photo albums and scrap books.
I use my camcorder to film their birthdays and Christmases.
I want them to look back have lots of memories, as well as lots of photos.
Some may say that a photo isn’t a true reflection on life. It’s a moment captured in time purposefully.
We’re told we’re having a picture taken, asked to smile and then there it is. A happy family moment captured forever, but what if moments before that picture was taken you had a blazing row with your other half or your kids were tearing pieces out of each other over a toy?
Does that picture give an accurate reflection of that day’s events?
Probably not.
That’s why memories are so important to me.
I want to create magical, fun memories for my children.
I want them to enjoy life and never let anything hold them back.
I want them to remember me as a mum who was always for their them.
A mum who enjoyed doing things with them.
Most importantly I want my children to know the real me.
I don’t know what my mums favourite colour is or what her favourite film was.
I don’t know if she liked Chinese food or Thai food.
It may seem insignificant, but these are some of the important things that help us discover who a person is.
I’ll always strive for the best for my children and I’ll always do anything for them, but I want them to remember me just as I am.
I want them to know me and be reassured by the fact that no matter how old they are or where in the world they are, I am always there.
So put down your phone, newspaper or laptop. Look up and enjoy the moment for now. For tomorrow It could all change. What would you do then?
4 Comments
Loving life with little ones
March 14, 2014 at 9:22 am
A thought provoking post, Sorry you didn't get to know your mum as well as you would have liked. I often think things like this and strive to do more things with the children and document them on my blog then there will always be memories for all of us to look back on. #binkylinky
Katie Clark
March 14, 2014 at 2:09 pm
This is such a beautiful post. I'm sorry you weren't able to get to know your mum as much as you would have liked to. How terribly sad to have lost her so young. You're so right – we need to enjoy the moment and spend time with our children while we can. Thanks for sharing #binkylinky
Michelle Maggs
March 14, 2014 at 3:52 pm
Lovely post and so sorry to hear about your mum. I am always taking photos of the girls and so pleased I now blog to document their lives, as it's something nice for them to see xxx
Little Miss Alba
March 16, 2014 at 9:35 pm
Beautiful post Emily – touching and heartfelt xxx Ax