Are you an over-sharent?
A few weeks ago my husband and I attended parents evening at our girls school. On the way out, my husband picked up a copy of a magazine called ‘Digital Parenting‘.
Having never heard of this publication before, I was curious to see what it was all about. As it happens, it’s pretty much summed up by its name!
The magazine covers a range of topics from cyber-bullying, fake news and screen time. One article I came across is called ‘Are you an over-sharent?’
I instantly felt a slight pang of guilt.
I mean I have been known to share pictures of my children and their achievements on my blog and personal social media channels.
When I first started blogging, I didn’t think anything of sharing pictures of my children, but as the years have gone by and my children are getting older, I find myself sharing pictures of them less and less. If I do share a picture of them, I usually make sure you can’t see their faces.
I have shared pictures of them with their faces showing for some toy reviews, but I try to keep it to a minimum.
What I was shocked to read in the article is that by your child’s fifth birthday on average they will have had 1,500 pictures of themselves posted online.
That’s quite a shocking figure!
I understand people posting pictures of their children on their personal Facebook pages, but I feel it’s really important to make sure that if you’re doing this your privacy settings are set high so that only your friends can see them.
I was also amazed to read some of the facts about sharenting:
71% of parents upload five or more images of their child each week on social media
9% of parents shared an image of their child in the womb
21% of parents have set up a social media account for their child
13% say they share photos of their children to gain social media followers
32% of parents have never asked their child if it’s ok to share a photo of them
I have to be honest here and admit that I’ve never asked my children if it’s ok for me to share a photo of them online. At five years old I’m not sure they’d fully understand the question, so I guess as a parent I’ve just made the decision, or assumption perhaps if a better word, that it’s ok for me to do so.
On occasion R will refuse to have her photo taken, and I respect that decision. If she doesn’t want her photo taken then I won’t take a photo of her.
I wonder if R and M fully understood the idea of sharing photos online, how they’d feel about it? How do you think your children would feel about?
It’s certainly an eye opener and has made me think twice about what photos I share of my children online.
I was also quite interested to learn that it’s illegal in France. The Telegraph goes into more detail about this, but basically parents could be jailed for posting children’s photos online.
To quote the article:
French parents are being warned to stop posting pictures of children on social networks in case their offspring later sue them for breaching their right to privacy or jeopardising their security.
Under France’s stringent privacy laws, parents could face penalties as severe as a year in prison and a fine of €45,000 (£35,000) if convicted of publicising intimate details of the private lives of others — including their children – without their consent.
Do you share photos of your children online? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
20 Comments
Helen Gandy
November 3, 2017 at 7:09 am
I do share photos of both of mine i think we live in such a digital era now it’s the norm. I hope they won’t mind when they’re a bit older! #ThatFridayLinky
Katie
November 3, 2017 at 7:35 am
It is the norm now. Everything is digital and online. I share photos on Facebook for the grandparents to see all of my security settings are on so only people I know can see my posts
The Rhyming Mum
November 3, 2017 at 7:38 am
This is exactly why it took me so long to start blogging. Until then I had only shared a handful of pictures online. It’s something I regularly worry about and probably will until R is at an age where she can understand and we can talk about it freely. I am very mindful of what I share about her but even then I know she might not want any of it out there. I’m starting to rethink my decision again now! Back to just sharing the back of her for a while I think! What bugs me more is when other people share pictures of my child without my permission. #thatfridaylinky
John Adams
November 3, 2017 at 7:57 am
I’ll be blunt, I am appalled at the approach taken by some parents. While a dad blogger, there’s no way I’d shared 1,500 pics of my kids online! Sure, I use them, but sparingly. As an older dad, I also notice a big difference in generations. Younger parents will post an image of a pig’s bladder on a stick without giving it a second thought. Older parents seem to be more aware of protecting kids’ privacy and are more reticent. Thanks for hosting #thatfridaylinky
Anne
November 3, 2017 at 10:32 am
It’s a personal decision that seems to differ throughout the generations. I have older children that I have never shared photos of online. The younger ones I have shared quite a lot but I do try to protect them as much as possible. I never share anything compromising, or just to embarrass them and I use nicknames on my blog. I find as they get older I share less and less and I’ve asked permission from since they were old enough to understand. I do understand that people want to respect their privacy and that’s fine, but we do live in a different time now where sharing is becoming more normal than not sharing. I think if you are careful about your sharing then it’s fine, but that’s just my opinion.
Becca Farrelly
November 3, 2017 at 11:28 am
This is something i was talking about the other day when i saw the stats on this also. I openly share a lot about our 4 yr old and i don’t really think twice about it. I suppose as she gets older and able to understand about the internet and social media, i will naturally stop sharing quite so much. We created a private Facebook account for her and have filled it with photos of her ready for when shes older as i kind of document of her life but that can be easily taken down if she doesnt want it! 🙂
#ThatFridayLinky
Kiri
November 3, 2017 at 12:39 pm
I post photos of my children on my blog, as it’s about family life and parenting so I’d find it hard not too, but I’m always careful about what I share and hopefully there is nothing that they would be too embarrassed about when they are older! It’s the norm now to post photos online, so even though I do it I don’t think I over share compared to a lot of people! #thatfridaylinky
Lexie @ mommyhomemanager.com
November 3, 2017 at 3:11 pm
Hm. Sounds like an interesting article!
It’s rough when internet privacy really seems like a thing of the past. I share my son’s picture all over the place…I’m the mom I never thought I would be! yikes.
I do get a little weirded out when people have profiles for their children. I come across instagram accounts for babies or kids all the time, and it make me uncomfortable…
Sonia Cave
November 3, 2017 at 3:33 pm
This is a really interesting read, as I use my three to illustrate my blog points (usually the back of them as they run off into the distance having fun). Gets you thinking #thatfridaylinky
Martin Lee
November 3, 2017 at 5:40 pm
Funily enough I have recently been thinking about this. I probably am guilty of over sharing on my blog. I think you are right to not show their faces. I will bare this in mind for the future!
Oldhouseintheshires
November 3, 2017 at 5:56 pm
I wrote a similar article last week on this…
https://oldhouseintheshires.com/2017/10/21/does-your-child-know-they-are-on-social-media/
I feel that children have a right to privacy but until they are at an age where they are old enough to decide, we must decide for them. I think many parents just don’t think about it but when 80% of 2 year olds have an online presence they should.
Great post. I think we should be very cautious about posting about our children. #thatfridaylinky
jeremy@thirstydaddy
November 4, 2017 at 2:01 am
Its a hard balance to find. Many of my friends don’t live near me and we see photos of our children and learn about their accomplishments from social media. I’ve had many conflicting feelings over this over the years, but I think that as long as we are intelligent about what we share and cognizant of the fact that these photos and updates are out there for all to see, common sense will guide us. These kids will grow up in a time when this is the norm, I think that by setting a good example of what is and isn’t appropriate to share, we can use these pics from today as a teachable tool in the future. #thatfridaylinky
Sadie | Be Your Own Example
November 4, 2017 at 9:33 pm
I’m shocked by parents who share pictures of their kids to gain social media followers…maybe it’s the wording, but that doesn’t sit right with me. But I also think the French stance is overkill, when you think of decisions parents are “allowed” to make on their children’s behalf (including modifying their bodies with ear piercings). What’s the difference between sharing photos online, and signing your kid up to a modelling agency or something?
I try to keep pictures of my children on my blog or public social media to a minimum. I ask my teenager before I write about him or use his image. Now my middle son is 5 I’ve started to ask him if I can let other people see the photo too. But I don’t share anything I think would reflect badly on them, so I don’t see the harm in it.
#thatfridaylinky
Zaleina
November 4, 2017 at 10:22 pm
This was the reason I abandoned my personal Facebook account over a year ago. Photos weren’t the only concern I had. I found that I was ‘stealing’ all the funny, clever things they said and posting it all online for family & friends to gush over. Family anecdotes were not private anymore. Now, perhaps I’m doing the same when I blog (!) but at least I’m exercising restraint with their photos.
Dad
November 4, 2017 at 11:12 pm
It’s a really great point and I don’t think a lot of parents think about this when their kids are young. I’ve never posted any identifying photos of my daughter. Then again, I rarely see photos posted by parents that worry me. #ThatFridayLinky
Chloe
November 5, 2017 at 10:07 am
Hi, I guess it is maybe a balancing act and down to what an individual parent feels. It would interesting to hear what parents from France think #ThatFridayLinky
Out Of Depth Dad
November 5, 2017 at 1:54 pm
Great post. It’s a tricky subject isn’t it? I am aware of not wanting to over-share about my son, while not being paranoid either. Whether I’ve struck the right balance, who knows? #thatfridaylinky
Jo – Pickle and Poppet
November 5, 2017 at 9:40 pm
I have a personal account which is looked down so people cannot even share my photos and only friends are on there. Then family can see the kids growing up and what we get up to. I’m more selective of the ones I share on my blogging page. You can see their faces but I chose them carefully. #ThatFridayLinky
Jaki
November 6, 2017 at 12:47 pm
I’ve thought about this more and more lately. I really think I am slowly going to go down the route of taking photos without showing his face. I ca’t do anything about the ones I’ve already shared but I can start to do something now he is getting older. Really interesting statistics. #thatfridaylinky
Musings of a tired mummy…zzz…
November 8, 2017 at 9:43 pm
Wow the French laws are strict! There s the problem of consent then: are children old enough or informed enough to make decisions on whether their parents can post pics? #thatfridaylinky