Why making friends is scary

When you’re a child making friends comes naturally.

Whether it’s in the local park, school or even doctors surgery, kids make it look easy! It’s a stress-free and pretty simple social situation for children. Not much thought goes into it, and surely that’s the way it should be?

However, as we get older making friends seems harder.

Add on a few years, some life experience and a good does of nervousness, and it’s a completely different ball game.

Adults have a terrible habit of worrying too much.

Will they like me?

Will I like them?

Do my clothes look ok?

Should I wear my hair up or down?

When I was in school I had plenty of friends. However moving onto college meant being away from those friends, and over the years we just lost touch.

I didn’t give it much thought to be honest. I was too busy trying to learn, find a job and find my place in the world.

Of course, the work place can be a great place to meet new people, but for others colleagues are just that. Colleagues, and no more.

I remember going to a play group with my twins one day. I was determined to make at least one new friend. As I scanned the room wondering who I should approach, a women entered with a small child.

I didn’t recognise her and immediately registered her as new to the group. Before anyone had the chance, I made my move! I went over, introduced myself and we started chatting.

The following week she was there again, so I asked her if she’d like to bring her daughter over to mine one day for play date with my girls. She said yes, and four years later we’re still friends!

As easy as that scenario sounds and played out, it took a lot of courage for me to do that. To approach a stranger and put myself very much outside of my comfort zone was a massive deal for me.

Some women and men, just don’t feel confident enough to make the first move. When we meet people and start to make friends, it can make us feel very happy indeed, but what do we do when this is something we struggle with? Well, I wanted to introduce you very briefly to a new app called Pal.

Pal is an app that helps to connect people in your local neighbourhood based on activities that you like. Whether you want to fulfil your New Year’s resolutions in the gym and would like someone to accompany you in doing this, or perhaps you’d just like to meet some other mums, there are a variety of categories to make it possible to find others for almost all activities.

The app is really easy to use. The home feed shows people in your are that have planned activities. If you’re interested in those activities, you can join in at the click of a button. Likewise, if you want to create your own activity for other people to join in with, then you can do that too.

I think this is a great way to make new friends and meet new people. Meeting people face to face can be pretty daunting, but by connecting online first, it can really help to break the ice.

What do you think? How do you prefer to make new friends? In person, online, or perhaps a mixture of both? I’d love to know!

 

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