The Two Week Wait Thread
It felt like we had waited so long to join the two week wait thread on the fertility forum and now we could finally do so!
Introducing ourselves and telling everyone our story, I met a lot of couples on the two week wait. The first page of the forum was filled with everyone’s names, followed by their test date and either a happy ‘cheerleader’ smiley or an animated ‘BFN’ (Big Fat Negative) smiley.
It started of pretty good, lots of cheer-leading, shall we say but the further down the list you went, the less cheer-leading there was and the more BFN’s there were.
We prayed we would have a cheer-leader smiley at the end of our name.
I remember my husband and I saying that we would wait until our official test date, August 5th 2011, to do our pregnancy test. Even though our consultant had said we could test on the 2nd, we were adamant to stick it out until the 5th.
I have to say that I am very lucky in terms of work. Working for a large company, my boss had been fantastic throughout all of my treatment. She was understanding, sympathetic and a good listener. She allowed me time off to attend all of our appointments and when I told her that I wanted to use up my holidays so I could have the day of egg collection off, all of the two week wait off and a further week after that (to give me some time to get over a negative result if that was the case), she didn’t hesitate. In fact, she told me to speak to my GP, to see if they would give me a sick note for the time off, so I wouldn’t have to use up all my holidays. I didn’t think my GP would do this, but to my surprise he did.
This was great news. It meant that if we did get a BFN, we could use my holidays to take some time out, gather our thoughts and decide on our next step.
Going back to the two week wait, if you have read my earlier posts, you will know that since egg collection I hadn’t had a full nights sleep. However, following embryo transfer, that night I slept through! I think subconsciously, knowing that our embryo’s were back where they belonged might have helped. Maybe not, but maybe it did!
The morning after embryo transfer, I was feeling good. Our two embryos, were hopefully settling in for the long run. I felt positive and kept visualising our baby growing inside me.
Before we embarked on the two week wait, I knew in my mind that it would be hard to think of anything but our embryo’s. With this in mind, I decided to write a list of things to keep myself busy:
1. Cook something you have never cooked before
2. Make fairy cakes
3. Read a book
4. Watch at least one of the 9 films you have taped, but are yet to watch!
5. Go for a walk
6. Continue working on the photo scrapbook
7. Make chocolate cake
8. Start writing a book
9. Go to the crematorium and lay flowers down for mum
10. Don’t search online for pregnancy symptoms!
Ok, I know there are more interesting things to do in life than make a cake or read a book, but I didn’t want to do anything too strenuous! Anyways, I just figured I’ll put jump out of a plane or wing walk on my bucket list instead!
The day after transfer, our embryologist called to let us know if we had any embryo’s that could be frozen. On the day of our transfer, he told us that we had 2 embryos that would definitely be frozen, so when he told us that in addition to those 2, he went on to freeze another 2 embryos the same day as our transfer as they were close to hatching we were delighted. But wait, he then went on to explain that the morning after our transfer, our 3 other embryos had expanded so they were also frozen.
What does that mean?
Well, I’ll tell you what that means!
7 frozen embryos!
7 seven snow babies!
However, you want to word it, we had 7 in the freezer!
This was great news! My husband and I were so happy. I think we may have cried a little! Without, thinking too negatively, it meant that if this cycle failed, I wouldn’t have to go through egg collection again. Not for a while anyway.
If you’ve read my previous post about our embryo transfer, then you’ll know by now that our embryologist has a habit of making us cry! In a good way! I’m pleased to say he didn’t disappoint with his next statement:
“You have multiple babies in the freezer! From an embryological point of view, your cycle has been perfect. I would be very surprised if you didn’t get pregnant from the 2 embryos you have on board!”
Doh! The water works came flooding out again! I must admit, hearing him say that made us feel so emotional and overwhelmed. We were trying so hard not to get our hopes up, knowing that if we did and the result was negative, we would have a big, long, hard fall, but we couldn’t help ourselves. We dreamt of our baby. Wondered what he or she would look like, whilst in the back of my back of my mind there was a tiny mini me fighting off those thoughts – down boy, down boy! Don’t get your hopes up! Stay sane!
Bruised & Broke
Before embarking on our IVF journey, I have to be honest and admit that my husband and I have been through a lot together. We are in an age gap relationship. 27 years of age gap, to be precise, and after my mum passed away in 2005, a few months later I fell out with my family. All because my now husband is 27 years older than me.
I was working a job that paid minimum wage. My husband was on the tail end of a divorce and came out of it with just his car. I was left homeless with nothing but a black bag full of clothes.
Somehow though, we picked ourselves up. My husband used what little money he had to pay for us to stay in a budget hotel, so we wouldn’t have to sleep in his car. We worked all the hours we could.
I would sneak into the hotel swimming pool where I worked so I could have a shower, before wandering down to meet my husband and find somewhere to stay for the night.
My husband came across a flat and after viewing it once, we promptly moved in. From then on in, I have to admit that I am pretty proud of all we have accomplished.
We didn’t have much to start with. A black and white TV stood on a wooden dining chair in the front room. We had a gorgeous green floral, worn out and tired looking sofa. I remember the picture on the TV would get smaller and smaller each day, until eventually it went altogether!
We had a double bed courtesy of our land lady. I emptied my black bag of clothes into the wooden wardrobe. My husband bought some cheap new clothes and hung them in his wardrobe.
We were happy though. That’s all that mattered, plus we could have been worse off. At least we had a roof over heads. Many people in this world don’t, so who were we to complain?
I found myself a better job and have been with the same company now for almost 7 years. We have savings and I own my own car.
5 years after my dad stopped speaking to me, we made up. Our relationship isn’t the best and my dad is no longer my dad anymore in the traditional sense, but at least he is back in my life.
Even though, we had spent most of our savings and put a fair whack on our credit card to pay for our treatment, we remained optimistic.
Monday, 25th July 2011
We decided to tell my husbands children (by his ex-wife) why there was a fridge full of drugs! When the time came though, we didn’t have to tell them. Children are so perceptive! My husbands daughter sent a text message to us the night before we were going to tell them. The text read:
“I think I know why you have been in and out of hospital. It’s because you want a baby”
Flabbergasted wasn’t the word! To our delight, my husbands children were both excited and happy for us. The thought of having another little brother or sister thrilled them. It thrilled me also that they used the term brother or sister not half brother or sister, just brother or sister.
After embryo transfer, the clinic had told me to rest for the first 2-4 days. Taking full advantage, I had my husband doing everything for me! It was great, so I was making the most of it!
The clinic also advised to ensure I was drinking at least 2 litres of water a day and to continue eating a high protein diet or healthy diet.
Regardless of the number 10 thing on my ‘keep busy’ list, I found myself searching online for pregnancy symptoms. I also found myself reassuring others on the two week wait that everything would be ok. Deep down though, I didn’t know if it would be.
Desperately hoping it had worked, I remember that the closer it got to our official test date (OTD) the more insane I felt I was going!
I did find one good thing online. Apparently, 1 day after a 5 day transfer your embryos should start to hatch out. 2 days after transfer they should start to attach themselves to a site on your uterus lining. 3 days after transfer, they should start to implant and start burying into the lining.
- 4 days after transfer – Implantation process continues and morula buries deeper in the lining
- 5 days after transfer – Morula is completely implanted in the lining and has placental and fetal cells
days after transfer – Placental cells begin to secrete HCG (the pregnancy hormone) into the blood
days after transfer – More HCG is produced as fetus develops
days after transfer – More HCG is produced as fetus develops
days after transfer – HCG levels are now high enough to be detected on a home pregnancy test
My husband and I decide that we can’t wait any longer. I know we said we would stick it out until our official test date but we just couldn’t. We hated the not knowing feeling. We needed to know! We decided that we would test tomorrow. The consultant had told us that we could test 10 days after transfer, so this is what we decided to do.
Although the clinic had given us a home pregnancy test, we went out and bought two more. We decided that we would use the two we bought from the supermarket tomorrow and then use the one from the clinic on our official test date.
August 2nd, 2011. Testing, testing, one, two, three!
05.30am. I was awake and desperate to test! I woke my husband, much to his delight! Grabbing a pregnancy test, I wandered into the bathroom and, well, you know, I peed!
Before I even had a chance to pull up my pants, my husband came in, walked straight past me and picked up the pregnancy test!
Here is what he saw…..
|Our Pee Stick!|
My husband said “We’re pregnant!”
Climbing back into bed, we hugged, we cried, we laughed and then we cried some more!
Was it true? Were we actually pregnant or had it all been a dream?
No doubt about it though, two very strong positive lines! They appeared so quickly!
I couldn’t go back to sleep! I didn’t know what to do with myself! I was tired but I couldn’t sleep!
We were over the moon, on cloud 9, you name it we were feeling it!
Could there really be a baby growing inside me? A tiny little human being?!
We used the second pregnancy test up the following day.
|The line gets stronger!|
Then we used the third one up on our official test date, August 5th, 2011.
|Our 3 pee sticks!|
All came up positive! We were pregnant!
I called the clinic to tell them our news and we were booked in for a scan on August 18th 2011, where we hoped to see our babies heartbeat.