Sibling Rivalry

October 23, 2014
I’m no stranger to sibling rivalry.
I’m an identical twin which means I’ve experienced a fair amount of competitiveness, jealousy and fighting between siblings.
I’ve got no doubt in my mind that as our children grow older, wiser and start to mature that they’ll have a great relationship with each other.
We have twin girls. They’re two and a half years old and although they have their similarities to look at, their personalities and mannerisms are quite different.
They often surprise me too with the way they behave.

For example I took them both to a local soft play centre and M climbed onto the trampoline for what seemed like the hundredth time!
Every time before this one I had joined her on the trampoline, but this time I held back .
R soon followed M and they were both happily bouncing and jumping around.
A little girl, who later told me she was four and a half years old, was also on the trampoline.
Out of nowhere M started to talking to the girl. 

“I’m jumping!” she said.
The girl smiled and asked M if she was ok.
I was surprised because M is usually quiet and when asked to say hello or to wave at someone she usually shies away.
Maybe it was because the girl didn’t feel like a threat to her or because she had a kind face. Or maybe even simpler than that, M is growing up and is beginning to feel more confident in herself.
Who knows. Either way since that incident M has been happily waving hello and goodbye to complete strangers in the shop and on the street.
She won’t approach them, but will sit happily in the comfort and secure surrounding of her pushchair whilst doing so.
If I had to give my opinion on our twins personalities I would say that M is more needy. That’s not a bad thing by the way! She likes to be picked up and likes to know where you are all the time.
She likes cuddles and enjoys being carried around. M is also desperate for R to show more affection toward her. When upset, M will ask R for a cuddle.
R won’t ever cuddle her. Maybe it’s her age or just her nature.
Having said that they do play well together and I we’re out and about and I ask them to hold hands because I can’t hold both of their hands, if for example I’m carrying a shopping basket, they’ll happily hold hands. No moaning, no questions asked.
There was a time when R wouldn’t have done this, but I think over time as they’ve become used to it. M certainly enjoys it and would rather hold R’s hand than mine!
R on the other hand is affectionate, but only toward mummy and daddy. Of course she’ll kiss her brother and sisters, aunties and uncles goodbye, but if asked to kiss M she won’t!
I won’t force it upon her as that’s her nature and if she doesn’t want to she doesn’t have to. I do wish sometimes though that she would just give M a little kiss or cuddle!
Although the other day M and I were playing and pretended to trap her between my legs. R came over, wrapped her arms around M and said I’ll help you!
It was lovely to watch.
They’ll also chase each other, pretend to feed each other and share toys.
They’ve also started to show each other their ‘baddies’.
I think because they’re twins there is an element of growing up in each other’s pockets. I mean when I was little I always knew where my twin sister was and who she was with. I kind of hope R and M are like that too.
What do you think? Do your little one’s have sibling rivalries?

3 Comments

  • newcastle familylife

    October 24, 2014 at 11:46 am

    aw it must be lovely to have twin girls after being a one yourself as you actually understand what it is like for them and can relate to them more. xx #BinkyLinky

  • Zena’s Suitcase

    October 24, 2014 at 9:51 pm

    I love that they sound so individual, but are twins too. We have rivalry in our house, but not in equal measures as one is still only a baby. The toddler definitely feels it though. Lovely post #binkylinky

  • Le Coin de Mel

    October 25, 2014 at 12:53 am

    Awww, you have twins and you are a twin yourself, that's brilliant! You must really understand them.

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