I recently read an article about Gordon Ramsey who was talking about how he wouldn’t be leaving all of his fortune to his children because he wanted them to earn their own money, which by the way, I admire.
In the article it mentioned how Gordon is good friends with David Beckham, but that he’s told his children they’re not to date any of the Beckham’s kids.
This made me think back to my own adolescence and how my parents controlled my relationships. It wasn’t necessarily friendships that were controlled, but relationships with boys.
Now, I totally understand the need for parents to look out for their children, but I don’t agree with parents trying to control who their children can and can’t see. That is unless, the person of their affections is dangerous or involved in illegal activity etc., then I say go ahead and step right in!
When I was younger, I remember dating someone who my parents blatantly didn’t like. It was mainly because of the area where the boy grew up, but also because he was kind of ‘rude’ toward them, but it was just the way he was. Rather than letting me figure it out for myself, I remember being sat down on the sofa in the living room and being told to end things with him.
Of course that just made me more determined to see him!
Like most parents, I am very protective of my girls, but I would never ever dream of telling them who they can and can’t see.
If I went through their entire life telling them what they can and can’t do, never allowing them to make their own mistakes, how on earth would they learn to live by them?
After all, that’s what mistakes are for! They’re a learning curve, a chance to reflect on what went wrong and how we can avoid making the same mistakes again.
I’m sure when my girls start dating, there’ll be a few people who I will most likely disapprove of, but who am I to stand in their way of happiness? As long as the person they’re with treats them right, makes them happy and is there for them, then I’ll be happy that they’re happy.
What do you think? Will you step aside and let your children learn for themselves, or will you step in and voice your concerns? I’d love to hear what you think!